Tag Archives: alcoholism

Parents of Addicted Loved Ones

This is Part One of a 3-part series on PAL, Parents of Addicted Loved-Ones, by Mike Speakman. Part One focuses on how PAL started. Part Two explains how Pal works. Part Three advises how to get involved. 

Mike Speakman, a Phoenix-based Family Education Coach, is the founder of Parents of Addicted Loved OnesContact Mike at: mike@pal-group.org or visit the PAL Group Site: www.pal-group.org

PAL
A support group for parents with a child suffering from addiction.
Part One: How it started.

Parents with a child addicted to drugs and/or alcohol can find hope in a support program called Parents of Addicted Loved-ones (PAL). PAL was founded in 2006 by Michael Speakman, LISAC, while working as an in-patient Drug and Alcohol Addiction Counselor in Arizona.

“In working with young people being treated for alcohol and drug addiction I witnessed how much the entire family is impacted,” Speakman says. “Parents in particular are beset with challenges they’ve never had to face before. I saw how difficult it is for them to identify and work through these challenges alone. And that’s what they feel—alone.”

Many recount their relief when they first realized: “I don’t feel all alone with this problem anymore.” While in truth they were going through what most parents go through when placed in the same situation.

This is the founding principle of the PAL movement. People helping people through the woods. PAL groups meet weekly to educate, support and help each other with issues arising from loving someone with an addiction. Each PAL group is facilitated by a peer, someone walking the same path. While the focus is on parents with an addicted child, anyone with an addicted family member is welcome, including spouses and adult children of an addicted parent.

In reality the active addict acts like a child, displaying childish behaviors such as tantrums, sulking, disregard of consequences, irresponsibility, immediate gratification and magical thinking. A husband or wife may experience the same immature behaviors with a spouse as a parent experiences with a child.

Regardless, once the addiction has surfaced, it’s hard for family members to know what to do, what to expect.

“We needn’t blame ourselves for not knowing what to do about an addicted loved one,” Speakman says. “There are no prep courses, no way to know exactly what to expect before it happens. But there is a curriculum for recovery. If we learn it, if we follow it, it works. There is HOPE. And it comes from educating ourselves.

“When we focus on educating ourselves rather than changing the person who is using, it takes a lot of the pressure off everyone involved,’’ he says.

“Just finding out for sure that a loved one is using drugs or alcohol can be difficult,” Speakman says. “There can be a lot of lying and denial. Once you know for sure, the next question is: What now? This is where the educating begins and where PAL can really help. There are others who have walked before you, some walking along with you, and others right behind. But all are on the same path.”

But knowledge doesn’t happen overnight. “Life is a marathon, not a sprint,” Speakman says. “We don’t learn instantly, we learn over time. It’s incremental learning. So we need to be patient with ourselves.

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Dealing with an Alcoholic Parent

Dealing with an Alcoholic Parent

     This week’s blog has been reposted from http://www.Addictionblog.com

 Alcoholic parents suck. They don’t wake up on time. They sometimes don’t dress or wash or cook for themselves or their families. But, the worst thing about an alcoholic parent is  they are sad or angry almost all of the time.

What is alcoholism?

Alcoholism is a disease. It starts out when your mom or dad drinks alcohol. Soon, she or he starts drinking more and more and cannot stop. This is because something is happening in their brains that makes them want to drink and to their bodies which makes it really hard to stop.

How do you know if your mom or dad is an alcoholic?

Some people might drink a lot but can control their drinking. Or some people will drink a lot on holidays or at weddings, or only on the weekends. So how do you know if your parent is an alcoholic or is beginning to have a problem with alcohol? Here are the 4 signs of alcoholism.

  • Alcoholics need to drink more and more alcohol after time to feel the same as when they started.
  • Alcoholics start to sweat, have an upset stomach, get shaky, anxious or sick if they  do not have a drink or try to stop drinking.
  • Alcoholics constantly think about (which is called having an obsession) with alcohol and have strong cravings to drink.
  • Once an alcoholic drinks one drink, they cannot stop, and continue to drink more.

What can you do if you have an alcoholic parent?

First, you have to know that you are not alone. According to a recent Nick News program on alcoholism, 11 million kids under the age of 18 live with one or more parent that is an alcoholic. That means that one of every 4 kids has an alcoholic in the family. It’s so common that there is nothing to be ashamed of…and IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!

So what can you do?

1. Know that it’s not your fault
2. Know you can’t fix it
3. Find the strength inside yourself to go on, in a different way

The hardest part of living with an alcoholic is you have to grow up fast. It’s like you’re the adult and your parent is the kid. But that’s what you have to do. You have to learn to know what you can and cannot control and then only change the things that you can control. It sucks. It really does. Often people in the AlaTeen * rooms call it ‘walking on eggshells’. But you cannot change your parents and you need to take care of yourself. Here are some other ideas for things to try out:

  • Don’t be afraid or to proud to talk to someone at school, church, in your family, or a friend about how you feel, you will realize you are not alone
  • Tell someone you trust what is happening and ask for advice
  • Plan an intervention and ask your mom or dad to go to a treatment center to help them break the obsession with alcohol (a rehab)
  • Go to Al Anon *, NOCA (National Association of Children of Alcoholics)  or ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics) if you are under 18 go to AlaTeen ( a section of Al Anon) meetings
  • Read about alcoholism and how other people deal with people in their family that are alcoholics
  • Join online groups that are featured on the web site: www.intherooms.com and chat about life and share your thoughts on:

o    Is your mom or dad an alcoholic?

o    What do you do to take care of them?

o    What questions do you have?

o    What do you do to feel good about yourself?

o    How are you dealing with your life?

Additional Information: 

*Free informational materials can be obtained by calling AlaNon/AlaTeen at (757) 563–1600, Monday through Friday, 8 a.m.–6 p.m.

http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/familyhistory/famhist.htm

 

 Reposted from http://www.Addictionblog.com

 

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Using the Power of Kundalini Yoga as a Resource for Recovery from Addiction Part 2

By Fred Haas

Fred has is an engineer, a spiritualist and a recovery coach in Texas. For more information on Kundalini Yoga as a Resource for Recovery from Addiction please contact Fred Haas at: Fred.Haas@sbcglobal.net

This blog presents information about the use of kundalini yoga as a resource for recovery from addiction. Kundalini yoga can be part of the core strategy in a recovery plan or it can be an added tool to supplement and enhance 12-step recovery. Last week the first part of this article provided background information on kundalini, kundalini yoga, and kundalini yoga as taught by Yogi Bhajan. This week the second part of an article that provides information on kundalini yoga and addiction recovery, kundalini yoga meditation, kundalini yoga kriyas and additional resources for further exploration of the topic.

Kundalini Yoga and Addiction Recovery
Kundalini Yoga began as a treatment modality when 3HO (Healthy, Happy, Holy Organization founded by Yogi Bhajan) ashram staff members in Washington, D.C. took in two heroin addicts and fed them. As an experiment they offered them recovery services. The heroin addicts were kept in a controlled environment for two weeks and put on a program that centered on Kundalini Yoga and meditation. Both men experienced an amazing transformation.

Super-health, the country’s first alternative health center for the treatment of addictions in Tucson, Arizona was created from this experience. Super-health developed into a systematized program with customized treatment plans for behavioral addictions including stress, substance abuse and other unhealthy habits and emotional disorders. The program included three Kundalini Yoga and meditation classes each day, providing a specific detoxification and rehabilitation diet complete with fresh juices, a vitamin and herbal regime, therapeutic massages, Humanology sessions (applied psychology from the perspective of Kundalini Yoga) and individual, family and spiritual counseling.

Super-health earned the prestigious western medical accolade of accreditation from JCAHO, the Joint Commission on Accreditation of Healthcare Organizations in 1978 and eventually received its highest commendation. Super-health distinguished itself as being in the top 10% of all treatment programs throughout the United States in 1978.

From these pioneering efforts of the Kundalini yoga community, yoga and meditation are becoming progressively incorporated into mainstream treatment facilities. It is increasingly more common for yoga and meditation to be integrated into treatment programs in hospitals, sober living houses and county treatment centers. From the Betty Ford Center in Rancho Mirage, California to programs in prisons, yoga classes are presented as either electives or mandatory therapeutic experiences. Kundalini Yoga advances the spiritual quest that Alcoholics Anonymous finds integral to recovery so it serves as a good supplement to the 12 steps.

In 2004, a life long goal of Yogi Bhajan, that his teachings to be brought back to India, became a reality. The Punjab government invited Super-health to conduct a 90 day pilot project for drug users in Amritsar, India. In October of that year, with a team of professional volunteers, the program opened to serve ten clients. The experience profoundly changed their lives.

Kundalini Yoga Meditation
In addition to the general benefits associated with meditation (remain calm and centered, peace of mind, self discipline, increased self esteem, greater awareness and higher consciousness), each Kundalini yoga meditation creates a specific effect. Examples of specific effects that are created by kundalini yoga meditations that help people in recovery include a meditation to shield us from negativity or a meditation to free us from guilt, blame, shame, resentment and bitterness.

The “Medical Meditation for Habituation” (also called the Meditation to break addiction) is one of the best meditations to specifically promote rehabilitation from drug dependence. This is a quote from the book Sadhana Guidelines for Kundalini Yoga by Gurucharan Singh that serves as the commentary for this meditation.

“The pressure exerted by the thumbs triggers a rhythmic reflex current into the central brain. This current activates the brain area directly underneath the stem of the pineal gland. It is an imbalance in this area that makes mental and physical addictions seemingly unbreakable.

In modern culture, the imbalance is pandemic. If we are not addicted to smoking, eating, drinking or drugs, then we are addicted subconsciously to acceptance, advancement, rejection, emotional love, etc. All these lead us to insecure and neurotic behavior patterns.

The imbalance in this pineal area upsets the radiance of the pineal gland itself. It is this pulsating radiance that regulates the pituitary gland. Since the pituitary regulates the rest of the glandular system, the entire body and mind go out of balance. This meditation corrects the problem. It is excellent for everyone but particularly effective for rehabilitation efforts in drug dependence, mental illness, and phobic conditions.”
The effects of meditation are mastered when they are established as part of a daily practice or Sadhana. This develops a life promoting habit. Humans are habitual creatures so we can actually change our destiny by changing our habits. According to yogic science, the human mind works in cycles. We can use various cycles to help replace unwanted patterns of behavior (mental or emotional habits), with new, more positive ones when we commit to a particular meditation or kriya for a specific time. It takes 40 days to change a habit. It takes 90 days to confirm the habit. In 120 days, the new habit is who you are. In 1000 days, you have mastered the new habit.

A duration of practice that lasts 40 days lets the meditation provoke your subconscious (mind) to release any thoughts and emotional patterns that hinder you. A good meditation will break your old patterns, put in a seed for a new pattern, and clear the subconscious.

The length of the meditation has an associated affect. Three (3) minutes affects the Electro -Magnetic field and blood circulation. Eleven (11) minutes affects the nerves and glandular system. Twenty two (22) minutes balances the three minds (Negative, Positive and Neutral) and they begin to work together. Thirty one to thirty three (31-33) minutes affects all the cells, the rhythms of the body, and the layers of the mind’s projections. Sixty two to sixty six (62-66) minutes alters the ‘grey matter’ of the brain – subconscious and outer-projection are integrated. Two and a half (2.5) hours alters the psyche in relation with the surrounding magnetic field to firmly hold the subconscious mind in a new pattern.

Kundalini Yoga Kriya
In kundalini yoga, a kriya is an exercise or group of exercises that have a specific purpose. It is a technique that produces an altered state of consciousness. Practicing a kriya launches a succession of mental and physical changes that affect the body, mind and spirit.

Choosing a kriya to support the recovery process is simplified because each kriya makes a claim to its specific effect. Examples of kriyas that can apply to people in recovery are the kriya for conquering sleep, the kriya for conquering depression, the kriya for liver detox, the kriya to get rid of anger and fear, or the kriya to be rid of internal anger.
Additional Resources for Further Exploration

Resources pertaining to Kundalini Yoga and Recovery:

Book:
• Meditations for Addictive Behavior by Mukta Kaur Khalsa, Ph.D.

Websites:
• http://super-health.net • A reprint from their website: Super-health is on the cutting edge of breaking habits and addictive behavior. It is at the forefront of yogic therapeutic technology that is precise and proven effective. The system addresses alcohol, drugs, smoking, food issues, co-dependency, gambling, work, and computers. It also includes stress, depression, fatigue and anxiety.

• http://www.wholeselfrecovery.com • A reprint from their website: The Whole Self Recovery Program facilitates journeys of healing and rejuvenation that purify, strengthen and merge the body, mind, heart and spirit. Whole Self Recovery offers an alternative to those who seek something other than the traditional recovery program styles as well as something alternative to the most popular 12 step programs. The program immerses the individual in a lifestyle where optimum physical, mental and spiritual health can be achieved and maintained using Kundalini Yoga, Acupuncture, Chiropractics, Ayurveda, Cleansing, Psychology, Addiction Counseling, massage, numerology and other elective therapies.

• http://www.totalhealthrecoveryprogram.com/home.htm • A reprint from their website: Total Health Recovery Program is a world class international holistic drug and alcohol residential-like treatment center and rehab program using master healers and innovative diagnostic and treatment technology to treat drug and alcohol clients. Total Health Recovery Program uses Kundalini Yoga and meditations because it has thousands of exercises available to the practitioner. It is one of the most powerful of all yogas. It is great for releasing stress.

• http://www.kundaliniyoga.org/kyt11.html • Reprint from their website: Food, diet, weight loss, eating disorders, and other addictive substances and behaviors-whatever our specific issue, everyday we are all confronted with what to put in our mouths and how the decisions we make affect our well-being. My approach is to use our addictive tendencies as a path to empowerment. In the process we can claim “the gifts from the garbage.”

Videos:

• Yogi Bhajan – An Effective Approach to Addictive Behavior http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auFInq0nMPc

• Yogi Bhajan -Yogic Approach to Addictive Behavior • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9fip6PzUMc4

• Carolyn Cowan – Addiction: Understanding the Addictive Mind • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cZbCLwxSL3c&feature=related

• Carolyn Cowan – Kundalini Meditations: Healing Addictions • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vyjJ2U-L3CE&feature=related

Article:
• http://www.healthy.net/scr/article.aspx?Id=2350 This article present treating the Chemically Dependent as a Resurrection Process By Sadhu Singh Khalsa LISW, MSW

Books:
• Kundalini Yoga – Guidelines for Sadhana (Daily Practice) by Gurucharan Singh Khalsa
• Kundalini Yoga – Unlock Your Inner Potential Through Life-Changing Exercise by Shakta Kaur Khalsa

Websites:
• http://www.yogibhajan.com Yogi Bhajan’s website: This site presents information about Yogi Bhajan, kundalini yoga, videos, kriyas and meditations.
• http://www.3ho.org Website for the 3HO Foundation: This site presents Information about 3HO, finding teachers, events, information about kundalini yoga and has some kriyas and meditations.
• http://kundaliniresearchinstitute.org Website for the Kundalini Research Institute: This site presents information about teacher training, courses/events and provides some tools for students and teachers.
• http://www.pinklotus.org This website provides a lot of information about Kundalini yoga and it does it in multiple languages.

• http://www.soulanswer.com Reprint from their website: Our Soul Illumines and Heals. What Your Mind Can’t See! Clear Your Mind, Nourish Your Heart, Empower Your Soul! Transform Fear and Pain to Profound Peace. Allow your Heart to be Deeply Nourished and Satisfied And Open to the Incredible Wisdom and Power of your own Unique Soul, your God-Self to become really, really HAPPY!

• http://www.kundaliniyoga.org/ This is the website for Kundalini Yoga. It is the most powerful yoga known, and was brought to the West in 1969 by Yogi Bhajan, it produces results 16 times faster than ordinary yoga. Its power comes from the Kundalini, an enormous reserve of untapped potential within each of us. It is normally depicted as a coiled or sleeping serpent, located in an area towards the base of the spine. By gradually and safely awakening this serpent and employing its power, you will benefit greatly from an elevation in consciousness, promotion of physical well-being and an expansion of awareness. You will feel more relaxed and at ease with yourself. Your life will be transformed into one which is happy, healthy & harmonious.

Thank you for reading this blog, if you would like to contact Fred and speak to him more on Kundalini Yoga, his email is: fred.haas@sbcglobal.net

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