Author Archives: Melissa Killeen

Addiction Recovery Coaching Program with Renowned Lecturers

Addiction Recovery Coaching Program with Renowned Lecturers Starting in July

Over the last few years I’ve noticed a subtle yet significant shift in the amount of people who struggle with addiction in our communities, yet few people receive the right care that they need to recover. Whereas 30 years ago you might have known a few individuals who drank too much, today’s addictions are widespread and include: Internet/relationships, alcohol, marijuana, gambling, opioids, LSD and more. 

Although alcohol has been on the scene from time immemorial – and a part of our culture – the emphasis from just making just a lechayim to tasting worldly experiences has changed our habits and I don’t believe we are better off because of it.

To simply tell an addicted individual that they should just attend a 12-step support group is not enough. A person with an addiction needs a comprehensive plan and an ongoing relationship with a recovery coach who can guide them and help them overcome any potential relapses. 

  • Understand the science and cures for addiction
  • Spot the signs of drugs/alcohol/Internet and relationship addictions
  • Offer guidance in developing new behavior patterns
  • Create an effective plan of action
  • Direct that person to the right medical/group/therapeutic resources
  • Utilize the teachings of Rabbi Dr. Avraham Twerski, z”l 

The truth is that when you know someone who is addicted there is no one else who will help your loved one unless you or someone else in your community takes the responsibility to help coach them towards recovery. Studies tell us that  80% of all addicts relapse within the year of leaving a treatment center and that between 25-35% of people who complete addiction treatment will be readmitted to treatment within one year. However, Recovery Coaching is one of the most effective tools in sustaining long-term recovery.

The 15-week online program led by Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT, includes special guest speakers including:

  • Dr. Judith Gisel, neuroscientist and author of “Never Enough: The Neuroscience and Experience of Addiction”
  • Mellisa Killeen, author of “Recovery Coaching”, expert in the field of Recovery Coaching, 
  • Justin Phillips, mother of son who OD’d from opioids and founder of overdoselifeline.org
  • Dr. Lee Radosh, one of the leading Addiction Medicine experts in the United States
  • Dr. Julia Loytsker, a psychologist who specializes in therapy to overcome addiction from the Caron Treatment Center. 

On the program which is accredited by the International Coach Federation, you will learn core recovery coaching skills that can significantly reduce the chances of relapse. Some of the core modalities of coaching include Motivational Interviewing (MI), CBT, Client-focused coaching, the CRAFT model, Torah-based psychology, and Viktor Frankl’s Logotherapy that helps coachees find more meaning in their lives without drugs. 

Participants will also learn how to connect to individuals through empathy and uncover more meaning in the recoveree’s life. They will also begin to understand why people become addicted. 

There is no question that alcohol and drugs are seen as an answer to the questions: How can I reduce my pain? How can I feel better about myself? What can I do that frees me from my limitations? But, is the answer they get true? Do drugs that temporarily reduce negative emotions really help in the long run?

At a lecture around two years ago Dr. Eli Rosen asked the audience “What is the opposite of addiction?” He answered that the opposite of addiction is connection. I would say this to be true on several levels: connection to one’s true self, connection to other people, and connection to G-d.

As a therapist who believes in the power of spirituality taught to us by our Rebeim and informed by the psychology of Viktor Frankl, I know the answers to these questions lie deep within and beyond us at the same time.

Greater awareness of one’s G-dliness gives us the only true freedom from the psychological limitations of the self and our traumas. This calls upon us to deepen our understanding of our true self informed by Chasidus. I’m not talking simply about a superficial form of study, but rather about a deep and personal exploration that can only be reached through contemplation and connection with those who care.

Concerning the second answer, Viktor Frankl alluded to this when he wrote “a person cannot reach behind himself and pick himself”. Psychotherapy is limited, especially when it only focuses on the self. Rather, we must recognize the spark within a person that searches for meaning. In the midbar we were guided by a flame and a cloud that was always ahead of the camp of Israel, implying that we must be guided to something beyond ourselves, to fulfill a purpose or meaning. This is why the Torah tells us that “Hashem went before them by day in a pillar of cloud to cause it to lead them on the way and at night in a pillar of fire to give them light”. The pillars of cloud and fire we’re always ahead of Am Yisrael. Meaning can only be found in things beyond ourselves. 

To help our children, teens and adults to overcome addiction, we need to help them find more meaning in their lives, articulate what “sparks” they want to elevate, and to connect to the resources that can help change their lives. Becoming an Addiction Recovery Coach is the first step in that direction.

Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist who helps treat depression, anxiety, trauma and addiction. He is the director of torahpsychology.org where he is running a new Addiction Recovery Coaching program to help combat addiction starting in July, 2021.

To register visit www.torahpsychology.org

or call Rabbi Schonbuch at 646-428-4723. 

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Best Porn Blockers

Here is the list of suggested apps for accountability and to screen inappropriate material from phones, tablets, and computers. The list is in no particular order.



Qustodio  ( https://www.qustodio.com )

X3Watch  ( https://x3watch.com/  )

Lion  (  https://lionapp.io/  )

IPPC ( impulse control.net )

Net Nanny (net nanny.com)

RemoteCom ( remote-com.com )

Custodio ( qustodio.com )

Covenant Eyes ( covenanters.com )

Accountable2You  (  https://accountable2you.com/  )

EverAccountable  (  https://everaccountable.com/  )

MM Guardian (geared for adolescents- https://www.mmguardian.com/  )

Adult Block  (  https://adult-block.com/  )

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A Congregation of One

I am a Jewish person who was born and raised in a Conservative congregation. Even though Judaism is considered to be a communal religion, I now reside in a community of one. How can that be? I am a prisoner in a United States Federal Prison and currently have the distinction of [being a congregation of one].

By Jeffrey Abramowitz, Executive Director of Reentry Services at JEVS Human Services

I am a Jewish person who was born and raised in a Conservative congregation. Even though Judaism is considered to be a communal religion, I now reside in a community of one. How can that be? I am a prisoner in a United States Federal Prison and currently have the distinction of being the only practicing, Jewish inmate. I arrived at USP Canaan – an irony in itself as Canaan is an important place in Jewish history – approximately four years ago, just before the Jewish holiday of Passover. Ashamed, disgraced, and void of all possessions, family, friends, colleagues, and even my wife of twenty-four years, I was by definition a “lost soul,” searching for a reason to awake and rise each morning.

       It must be made crystal clear that there are no excuses, rationalizations, or plausible justifications for my actions for which I pled guilty to in a court of law. Standing before my family, friends, clients, and my community, it was time for me to accept responsibility for what I had done, try my best to learn the lessons that God intended by placing this difficult detour in my path, and find a way to move forward. This certainly is no easy task for a once respected attorney and member of both the Jewish and secular communities, who seemingly, had everything. To say I was lost is an understatement; I was in exile.

        Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “in the end, we remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.” No truer words have struck my ears. My legal troubles began over two years before the fateful day of my sentencing. Initially, my rabbi and a few friends from my congregation were supportive. As the legal process continued, I found myself no longer welcome in this sacred space and community I had once considered home. While I tried my best to understand and accept this as part of my punishment, I wondered how a place of worship that was once warm, inviting, and rich with traditions, and that preaches inclusivity, could so abruptly close its doors on someone so in need of guidance.

After entering the criminal justice system, accepting responsibility for my actions, and trying to understand how and why this happened to me, I could not help but think that somehow, my Jewish faith, and even God, had failed me. This initial thought could not have been more wrong: it was not God, my synagogue or anyone else that was culpable for my downfall, and no one besides myself could be responsible for mending my soul. It was up to only me. After months of struggling with my own Jewish identity at the beginning of my incarceration, I returned to my religion. However, my faith and practice looked drastically different this time – no minyan, no congregation, no traditions, or rituals. Rather, it was just me in a cinderblock room with a prayer book – alone with God. Time has not healed the wounds that I have caused but it has given me the opportunity to learn lessons of humility, honesty, tolerance, and has blessed me with a chance to restart my life and to try to fix the pieces I had broken. Re-introducing Judaism was a part of this goal as my religion often preaches a doctrine of breaking and repairing. Jews have an appreciation for how a shattering can lead to a rebirth. Your whole world may be destroyed, only to be rebuilt. “Tikkun” or “to repair” is a central tenet of the Jewish ideology I was always taught. Similar to the floods that Noah faced and the destruction of the sacred Temple of Jerusalem, Jews have historically faced cataclysmic life events which required that we searched deep within ourselves for the wisdom and strength to survive and to grow. In this process, a new person is created. This was the evolution I yearned for in that cinderblock room we called the “chapel.”

            Even though other incarcerated Jewish people have come and gone over the years, I am at least, for now, a congregation of one. Every Friday night, I enter a vacant, white, cinderblock room that has been transformed into our “chapel” because of the holy ceremonies that take place within its walls. This room contains holy books and religious texts for every religion imaginable. There’s a single bookshelf dedicated to Jewish prayer books and writings. While there is no Torah, we are given access to a locker which holds Matzah (used in place of Challah for Shabbat kiddush), two candlesticks (one of which has been broken after years of wear), two candles, several kippot, including one made of yarn by a fellow inmate who is practicing his crocheting. I begin my weekly Shabbat service in the same fashion as how the ceremony begins at my home synagogue: with the lighting of the candles. This practice is aided by a correctional officer who holds the lighter, as a fire source cannot be possessed or held by an incarcerated individual.

The service follows the Siddur and includes frequent pauses for reflection on the past, consideration of the realities of the present, and fixation on dreams of the future. My service includes personal touches – I always end with a prayer for my daughter and the singing of my favorite Jewish song, Hatikvah. The conclusion of the service requires the assistance of a non-Jewish inmate to blow out the Shabbat candles as the prison does not permit for them to burn out on their own, but Jewish custom prevents practicing Jews from extinguishing the candles. I conduct this Shabbat ritual every Friday night, and the tradition has come to mean more to me than any religious service I have ever attended with the exception of my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah in Israel. As each Jewish holiday approaches, I look once again at where I am and reevaluate my religious beliefs in light of my current journey. I’ve come to understand that religion cannot be used as a crutch as we walk through life, but should serve as the guidebook on the intensive, introspective labor we must practice in hopes of building a meaningful and purposeful existence. We cannot assume that religious beliefs will absolve us of our wrongs, provide us with a “get out of jail free” card or miraculously heal the wounds which our hands have created. Being a person of faith does not grant us universal forgiveness for our mistakes, but rather, a pathway to understanding how our errors can ultimately improve our lives.

            When I pray during these sacred moments that I create, it is for those that I care most about in my life. Those that I have touched with my words, actions or mistakes and those who I hope can find it in their hearts to forgive. My prayers are for health and hope and happiness. They are for the things and experiences in my past which may mold who I am, and for the things yet to come which will help shape who I will be. My prayers are for strength, courage, and for the unwavering conviction that I always see my glass as half full, as I remain grateful for what I have and aware that things could always be far worse. As I continue my journey, I appreciate my ability to apply the lens of my Jewish faith to each challenge I face. I move forward knowing that the life I have been blessed with will not last an eternity. Instead, my goal in life is to be happy, to fill the world with friendship, love of mankind, compassion, and reverence of the reality that our time on earth is limited and each second is far too precious to waste. Even in my congregation of one, my Jewish faith continues to support and sustain me.

Reposted with permission from  The Thrive Global Community and the author. Published on February 21, 2021. Written by: Jeffrey AbramowitzExecutive Director of Reentry Services at JEVS Human Services

Jeffrey Abramowitz, J.D. is the Executive Director of Reentry Services for JEVS Human Services and Program Director of Looking Forward Philadelphia. Jeff was a 2018 Fellow for Justleadership USA and has most recently served as the Director of Student Services & Workforce Development for Community Learning Center.

Jeff was a trial lawyer in Philadelphia before poor choices in life and his professional career resulted in acceptance of responsibility and a five-year sentence in the federal prison system. Entering the criminal justice system allowed Jeff the opportunity to see the world with a new pair of glasses and find his passion for education and workforce development. In the short 4.5 years since Jeff has been home, he has worked with over 4,000 individuals, spoken and lectured across the country to educators, administrators, communities, and those touched by our criminal justice system.

Jeff  proudly sits on the Executive Board of the Coalition on Basic Adult Education, COABE, where he serves as the chair of the Literacy Behind and Beyond the Walls Committee, was appointed to the Pennsylvania Reentry Council and serves as Chairman of the Employment Committee and Co-chairs the Reentry Committee for the PA Workforce Development Board. Jeff is active in the Philadelphia Reentry Coalition. Jeff serves on the board of directors of Community Forgiveness & Restoration, a member of Nation Swell Council, and Advisory Board Member of Philadelphia Petey Greene Program.

Jeff is presently a LINCS Reviewer, Literacy Information & Communication System, Resource Collection, for the Department of Education, and serves on the National Association of State Directors of Education, Barbara Bush Foundation Criminal Justice Work Group.

Jeff is the producer and host of the award-winning weekly radio show “Looking Forward” on Philly Cam Radio WPPM 106.5FM. Jeffrey is a writer, keynote speaker, and lecturer around the country on issues of adult education, workforce development, and criminal justice.

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